That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Found the puke drawer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize