your room smells of hookers.
And success
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize