Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
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