My first STD was from a foam party
I wanna passion pit in your ass
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
