it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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