are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
