i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
