I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
