Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
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Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Hello my rib-scented angel!
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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