my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
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