you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Randomize
