reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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