left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
