you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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