Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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