wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
