I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Randomize
