i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
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