Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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