why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
