there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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