I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE