we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Randomize
