Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
