He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
