Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
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