I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
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