Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Randomize