hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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