Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
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