I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.