OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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