and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
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i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
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Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
how does that bad decision feel?
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