i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
