Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
