We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize
