it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
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