That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I need to stop coming to work sober
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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