We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
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Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
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I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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