Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
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I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
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did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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