3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
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