If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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