Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Enjoy the penises
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
