What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize