Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
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