OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
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