I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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