Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
