drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Randomize
