i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
