U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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