Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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